To: The controller, Disaster Board of Examinations

Respected  Disaster board of Examinations,

This is to bring to your kind notice that there is serious increase in causalities and failing people, year on year due to poor education system and flaw in your exam patterns. I, on behalf of the entire disaster stuck council, am writing to you requesting  changes in your disaster exam structure . Listed below are our obligations for your actions please.

A Common syllabus

 If it’s a common test, there needs to be a common syllabus! Its globalization era dude.  So grow up and give us everything that we need everywhere and then take test. Don’t pocket your resources and leave us to ponder. A broken bottle of elixir or an habituating venom, divide and give to us in stake. Because our teacher forgot to teach us how to share!

Pre announced exam time table

 Train us all with one skill at a time! Building bridges, digging wells or fighting fire are entirely different concepts and hence not to be graded simultaneously during the same season. You flood a portion of yours, suck every drop of water from another, burn down jungle elsewhere and still expect us to survive on you whole ? So please, at least tell us what exam it is next, so that we will be well prepared.  

Relaxed exam time

You know how big the textbook these days are. If there is so much to study, of course! there is gonna be enough to write. We haste and scribble and are still not completing your entire exams paper. I seriously request from our entire council to give us enough time to de-silt your bed, built boats and dams, bore well, gather funds and prepare enough bund to hold your rains. You, in no time ring the bell and drain blood down from every face on the open exam ground.

Open book test

Next is the request for an open book test. We have grown up googling brother!  Be it a scorching sun or irresistible tide, we can easily pass if you don’t do shut down our network signals. But you do that as the first thing and make our assessments ever more harder.

No” Out-of-syllabus” questions please!

You are already screwing up hard even if the Deccan dries or Bramaputra  floods. Out of no where why do you bring in new new questions and hardships every year. We are all simple humans with nominal IQ’s. So kindly be merciful on us to first teach and then take test.

Looking forward for your kind consideration and get a positive revert from your end on this regard!

Yours faithfully

Just another exam feared student